thanks..

Thanks to my cousin's obsession to "free internet games sites", my desktop is once again blessed with a virus. I can't open any application or program. All my desktop allows me to do is to switch it on, then switch it off. Argh. Soooo pissed off right now.

On a lighter note, I finally have my own copies of The Zahir and By the River Piedra I sat down and Wept. I've read the latter before but I'm gonna read it as soon as I finish The Zahir, hopefully tomorrow night. Haha. Man, being a bookworm is oh-so-cool. Nyahaha.

Oh before I forget, I want to say thank you to my mum for buying me the two novels! See, my mom is really supportive of my needs to read. Oh ha oh ha. Mum, if ever you're reading this, I want the new Motorola Razr v9, and a Sony Cybershot or a DSLR camera will do. Also, I fancy those Nike High Dunk Rubber Shoes which costs roughly twice my tuition fee a pair. Hmm, three pairs will do. Bwahaha. *Dreaming*

The clan welcomed the eleven new members earlier this evening. Uhm, I'm really excited to get to know them more. There's Camille who was my classmate in Brain Train before, Kimson's girlfriend Acel, and Chase whom I often see at Jungle Java. Haha. Oi, pasalamat kayong tatlo at instant celebrities kayo dito sa blog ko. Jokeness.

I've managed to get a hold of BACA's curriculum and I made my plan of coursework (while in HumE1..baaaaddd) and by the looks of it, I'm gonna graduate in the year 2010. I entered college in 2005, and supposedly be a graduate on 2009, but due to unforeseen yet very likable circumstances (aka my shifting from BS Bio to BACA), I have to take two additional semesters. Sabi nga nila "Quality education takes Quality time..".

Obviously I'm blogging about senseless stuff. I'm gonna get back to Coelho now.

currently reading: The Zahir by Paulo Coelho

..news flash..

Congratulations to the following who have successfully passed the final screening for the UPLB Street Jazz Dance Company:

• Acel Ledonio
  
• Alexa Martinez
  
• Aylin Bartolome
• Camille Elvina
• Chase Isip
• Clara de Villa
• Jenny Perdigones
• Jazz Jose
• Kevin Alvia
• Vonel Amador
• TJ Orleans

Practice hard, study harder! All for God's greater Glory! Welcome brods and sisses!

dana's..

Yes. Thanks to my bestfriend Kat Amaran, I've decided to ditch my ballroom dancing class. Kamote. I'd choose an air-conditioned computer shop as to an "inferno-inspired" place (known to some as the second level of the Baker Memorial Hall) anytime.

Hay. For the sake of blogging....


"Honor. Dignity. Self-respect. Although, when I think about it, I've never had any of those things. I didn't ask to be born, I've never found anyone to love me, I've always made the wrong decisions--now I'm letting life decide for me."
- Eleven Minutes (Paulo Coelho)

..news flash..

• You might want to read my lighter writings located in my other blog. (Chris' Naglalagablog link on the sidebar)
• Thursday night's the Foam Party event.
• Also, don't forget to see Jungle Java's event also this Thursday night.

Now where shall you find Chris on Thursday......

irrational..

Irrational : Chris

'nuff said.

sabaw..

6:50pm
Ako na ang kinabahan nang may nakapagsabi na nsa cr ka lang. Agad naman akong nagpunta sa sulok nang simbahan upang abangan ang iyong paglabas. Nakakasabik. Inantay kita ng ilang minuto ngunit hindi ka pa lumalabas. Malamang ginagawa mo lang ang ilang "mandatory girl things" pag nasa banyo. Shit. Bakit ganito ang nararamdaman ko. Naalala ko tuloy yung unang beses akong sumakay sa Space Shuttle sa Enchanted Kingdom, sa di kalayuang Senerowza. Hay.

6:56pm
Patuloy akong nag-antay, hanggang sa may nagsabi sa akin na nakalabas ka na nga raw at tumungo na papalabas ng simbahan. Disappointment. Hmph. Taene. Gusto pa man din kita makita. Gusto ko din marinig kahit saglit lang yung boses mo. Kahit na sabihin mo pang "nakakatampo ka,alam mo yun..", ayos lang. Marinig ko lang ulit ang tinig na ilang buwan nang hindi napapakinggan nang aking mga taenga.

sabaw tong entry ko..promise..

I tried really really hard, as in hard like a diamond (ampucha), para maintindihan ang mga sinasabi ni Father Gabby (tama ba isfeyling o G-A-B-I dapat?). Hay. Wala. Wala akong naintindihan talaga. Sorry Papa Jesus (from here on now, let's address Him PJ ;p). Hindi ko pinakinggan. Mas pinakinggan ko pa ang sarili ko habang nakanta at ginagawan ng second voice with matching Pinoy Pop superstar oh di kaya'y American Idol kulot at adlib ang kantang Hesus.

9:05pm
Staring blankly out the window as the guys continued their chat. Ano pre? Yung ex ni ganito, na ex mo din dati, eh may asawa na? Si ano? Ampucha. Eh mas gwapo pa alaga kong surot doon eh. Boys will be boys. The usually cramped place looked big now that only ten people, excluding the waiters, occupied the dimly lit cavern. I'm not too familiar with this place, but it made me feel at home. Maybe a "home" is not exactly a place. Maybe it can be anywhere. A certain place where people whom you consider family is there, now that's home. But I'd still prefer my humble blue-colored abode anytime. (wink)

9:20pm
The gentle night breeze, greatly emphasized thanks to the speedy jeepney, touched my face and blew my once-again-out-of-bed-styled-hair. Lagi na lang bang hangin ang hahaplos sa akin? Kailan ko mararamdaman ang malalambot mong palad na dadampi sa aking mukha, kasabay noon ang tuluyan mong pagkuha at paglusaw sa kabuuan kong puso na pumipintig para sayo.

Shit. Kahit ako na-cheesy-han doon.

I slumped into a very uncomfortable monoblock chair right after finishing up my dinner. It was starting to rain and the wind is getting colder by the second. I looked at our newly-cleaned fish tank and was surprised to see that our flowerhorn has grown. I never was a fan of any fish (Dolphins are mammals, mind you ;p) especially those who look like they have cerebral palsy or whatever. I did somehow get attached to our Arowana, aptly named Ari (RIP), who was once the transient in the fish tank. Back in high school, I would not let the night end without me going near her tank and just stare at her. Her slim, savvy, monotonic features blended nicely with the blue light that I've placed atop her glass kingdom. I would take the time to really look at her and use that as a prompt for my day's reflection. Now I'm staring at the complete opposite of Ari. Pumpkin, I gave her the name a while ago, is a somewhat short, stout and very colorful. Funny, because I just said to myself that I'm gonna treat her the way I treated Ari. Hmm. Ari's gone. She may have been the best, but I can't do anything to bring her back. I now have Pumpkin, and yes, I can learn how to love her the way I loved Ari. Only, it would take time.

Double meaning ba..? Hindi ko nga magets kung bakit ko sinulat yan eh..Told you I'm sabaw...

plans ni chris

1. pinlano ko na mag take ng isang multimedia course oh di kaya'y writing course sa Maynila.
2. pinlano ko na magpapayat, magpapauti, magpakinis, at magpa-discover.
3. pinlano kong magka-girlfriend bago mag 12 years old.
4. pinlano kong pumuntang Singapore noong bakasyon.
5. pinlano kong basahin ang Harry Potter and the Deathly hallows.
   
6. pinlano kong iplano ang buong buhay ko.

ang kinalabasan

1. bs bioloy an kurso ko ngayon.dito sa uplb.ngunit next sem, matutupad na ang pangarap kong maging isang BA Communication Arts Student.
2. pumayat ako ng konti. pumuti ako ng konti. kuminis ako ng konti. napa-tv na ko ng konti.
3. nagka girlfriend ako bago ako tumungtong ng high school.pero 2 months lang kami.
4. nag lts2 ako nung summer kaya hindi ako natuloy sa Singapore. Gustong gusto ko pa man din makita yung leon na sirena. Ampuchanamanow.
5. salamat kay Ma'am Bucoy eh nalaman ko na na namatay sina Snape, Lupin, Dobby, Fred at natapyasan nang taenga si Fred, magiging mag-asawa si Harry at Ginny at mabibiyayaan sila ng tatlong supling. Spoiler oh.
   
6. hindi ko maplano ng maigi ang buhay ko. Andaming nagbabago. Ang alam ko lang sa ngayon, kahit na gustong-gusto ko na mangyari agn ilang mga bagay-bagay, kapag hindi pa nakasaad sa log book ni PJ na mangyayari ito, hindi tala ito mangyayari. Sabi nga Niya, in His own time daw. Hmm. Tatlong taon na akong walang relo, magkaroon kaya ng dipirensiya pag bumil at magsuot na ulit ako nito?

sabaw sabaw sabaw..

listening to: Show me the Money - Petey Pablo
reading: NASC10 hand-out. amphness.

over..

Arteriosclerosis. A disease wherein arteries harden and clog up. Mostly induced by my aunt's cooking. Shit. If you guys wanna try adobo or any other viand for that matter don't, and I mean don't let my aunt cook for you. Define meat and other stuff floating in a literal "oil spill". To think that she has knowledge that hypertension trickles in our bloodline. The nerve. I often complain about her oily cuisine but all my mom ever does is throw me the "maraming hindi nakakakain diyan na mga tao..". Hmmmm. Marami pala eh. Give it to them na lang. Let's see if even those starved beings try to go near her sebaceous cooking. One more thing about her cooking, uhm, she overcooks vegetables to the point that they look like fresh out of Gerber bottles. Okay I'm exaggerating a little but I only eat veggies if they look appealing, again I'm sorry for she can even make potatoes uglier than the squished Mr. Potato in Toy Story. And you call yourself a cook? Come on! Over sa langis mehn..

I'm supposed to be studying for my NASC10 exam tomorrow afternoon but my best friend laziness came by and made me sit here in this friggin' white monoblock chair in front of my ever (bilena?) beloved pc and started writing. Again. I haven't a clear idea on what things to write really, but my fingers are doing their job right now. Tap tap tap tap.

Writing slash typing break.

Just got out of the shower and it still feels sooo hoooot. Wake up people. We've gotta stop all these burning-trash-so-it-wouldn't-clutter attitudes. We need to protect the environment. Greenhouse gases, which are actually beneficial trust me but only in moderate amounts, are beginning to increase in quantities. And this my readers is the main cause of our recent villain the, the big GW. Yes, Global Warming. I'm no Al Gore (I'd love to, given the chance) but hey, everybody should do something for our mother earth. Over na sa kainitan. You feelin' me hommies?! Holler yeah! Ghetto.


I hate James Yap. Yes, I do think he's an excellent basketball player, well at least according to some people who dishes out facts about his stats, but I hate him because he has Kris Aquino. Shit man. Kris Aquino has been my long time crush. She has everything! Wits, beauty, glamour, attitude and of course, fame. However, she lacks something. ME! (Rolls on the floor laughing. Gets up. Scratches his head.). People think Kris Aquino is such an overrated person. I say not. People say she has too much exposure. I say that's great. People say she's maarte. Well, that's true. Haha. But that's what makes her Kris Aquino for sobbing out loud!

I was supposed to be in two meetings this afternoon. One is a choir practice for tonight's mass, while the other is a meeting slash guluhan-asaran-at-baka-walang-mangyaring-get-together para sa tenth annive concert ng clan. I ditched both so I could study and internalize (may ganun?) my hand-outs in NASC10. Ampucha, hindi ka rin naman nag-aaral. Kamote. GE subject na lang, 45 pages pa ang hand-out.

Parang awa mo na Chris. Review. Review. Review.

watching: MOVE up to 6 (finals)
stuffing my mouth with: nothing

maria..

I'm longing for Maria.

Mercedes?

No.

Goretti?

Nah.

Makiling?

Nada.

I'm blabbing about Maria from Paulo Coelho's Eleven Minutes. Yes, my oh-so-feyvreet-novel that I've read for like hundreds of times ever since the day my mom accidentally bought it when I asked her to buy me a copy of Coelho's The Alchemist. I admit that I got bored reading the first chapters of the book. What really got my attention was the part where she began to do "things-young-people-should-not-do". Haha. Boys will be boys. Chris will be Chris. Anyways, as her sexual maturity evolved, so did my interest and understanding for the novel deepened. See, I'm just not about the kissing and whatever things. Haha. I finished the entire book and I repeated it again and again and again.

I'm longing for Maria. Sadly, she's nowhere near me right now. Hay. Ibalik niyo na libro ko. Amphness.

listening to: Summer Love by Justin Timberlake
stuffing my mouth with: Keebler's Honey Graham Crackers

lesson number one, never,as in never,compare..

Pagkagising na pagkagising ko mula sa aking umpakahimbing na tulog (salamat ulit pareng Miguel Lights-o) ay ikaw agad ang nakita ko. Paanong hindi kita mapapansin eh nakasalampak ka sa ibabaw ng 14-inch na LG TV sa kwarto ko. Lagi mo kong pinapa-alalahanan. Love Never Fails.

Flashback..(sshhhhwwwoooosssshhh...eng...eng...eng...)

Friday noon. Dalawang araw bago ko i-celebrate ang aking eighteenth birthday (2006 to mehn). Pareho tayong may vacant period kapag umaga tuwing Biyernes. Tinext mo ako't pinapunta sa green table kung saan una rin tayong nakapag-usap. Binati mo ko ng "advanced happy birthday!" at ako'y napangiti. Unang ngiti ko yun nung araw nayon sa kadahilanan na rin na may ibinagsak akong exam noong nakalipas na araw. Sumpain si Sabularse!!!. May inabot ka sa'king blue na envelope at sa loob noon ay may post-it note na nagbibigay nang instructions. Nasabi ko sa sarili ko, "wow.may ganitong pakulo.kewlness". Sinundan ko ang lahat ng kalokohan na nakasulat sa mga papel na natatagpuan ko sa tuwing susundin ko ang mga instructions. Sa wakas, nahanap ko ang "treasure chest" at nakamit ang aking regalo.Isang bote na lalagyan ng gatas na may nakasulat na "for my baby" (awwww) at isang pekeng Toblerone na kahoy na sa kahon noon nakasulat ang mga katagang "Love Never Fails". Nasabi ko noon na ito na ang best birthday ko.Incomparable.

Flashback..(sshhhhwwwoooosssshhh...eng...eng...eng...)

Seventeenth birthday celebration nating dalawa. Pinagsabay na natin sa kadahilanang hindi ko na matandaan. Dinala natin ang barkada sa isang eskinita at doon sila'y pinapasok. Kadiri. Mausok. Amoy isaw. Yan ang tinahak na daan patungo sa Lacxo Grill sa may junction. Sobrang saya ko nang gabing yon. Hindi maikakaila na na-miss kita. Ilang buwan (teka, isa lang naman) tayong hindi nagkita. Nasa "luntiang paraiso" ka at ako'y naiwan sa "buko pie capital ng Pinas". Kumain. Nagkwentuhan. Naglakad patungo sa noon ay "developing" LB Square pa lamang. Umupo sa mga upuan (halleeerrr) sa Jungle Java at nagsimulang mag-inuman. Shit. College na nga tayo. May pa inom-inom at yosi pang nalalaman (hindi ako nagyosi ha..). Sobrang saya ng gabing yon para sa'kin. Incomparable. Hindi dahil nasolo kita, kundi dahil nakausap ulit kita. Hinding-hindi ko makakalimutan ang birthday celebration natin na yon. Paano ko makakalimutan? Eh yun ung huling birthday ko na kasama kita.

Time warp..(sshhhhwwwoooosssshhh...eng...eng...eng...)

Obviously magka-ibang tao po ang tinutukoy ng yours truly (junilee?!!!?). Sabaw. I'm sooo pathetic. Hindi ko alam kung bakit ako nagkakaganito. Hmph. Ang pinaka safe na alng atang bitawan kong salita dito is mahal ko kayo. Isang minahal. Isang minamahal. Kayo na ang bahalang maghusga kung sino sa dalawa ang alin.

It's good to have memories. Memories of times you really enjoyed. Events, people, and other what-nots carefully engraved in our hearts.

Kamote. Bakit kaya ang aga kong nagising ngayon kesa kahapon?

Ampucha. Sabing wag mag-compare.

dalawang bote..

Malamig.

Masarap.

Dalawang characteristics nang isa sa tinuturing kong kaibigan.Ang beer.Oo,beer.Salamat sa sari-sari store slash eatery namin (na hindi ko alam kung may kinikita pa dahil sa mga utang ng mga customer) eh nakakuha ako ng libreng San Mig Light na hindi siyempre alam nang kung sinumang pontio pilato na nagmamanage ng tindahan namin.Kumuha ako ng isang bote at binuksan ito agad.Lumagok, at napagtantong kukulangin ang isang bote para sa ngayong umaga.Ala una y medya na pala.Hindi naman talaga ako manginginom dati.Lately lang ako nagsimulang "malulong" at magpakasasa sa alcohol.Kumuha pa ako ng isang bote at dinala pareho papunta sa aking kwarto,siyempre hindi ko nakalimutang kumupit sa tindahan ng mga kornicks na i-imaginin kong mojos o di kaya'y nachos na isasawsaw ko sa masarap na salsa galing sa Isis Cafe.

Unang bote..

Sa tingin ko, pwedeng pwede si German Moreno sa graveyard shift sa isang call center.Kamusta naman ang ka-aktibuhan niya kahit madaling araw na(time check - 1:38am) plus his shining shimmering clothes na kumitil sa libo-libong buhay nang mga gamu-gamu,salagubang at salaginto.Tama siya sa HSBC dahil ayon sa mga kwento-kwento eh ang mga kasuotan ng tao doon eh "defying norms" daw.Checkered na trench coats.Rainbow-colored shirts and matching pants.Knee-high snake skin boots with 4-inch heels.Samahan mo pa nang roygibv-colored hair.Saan ka pa.


A little history on this new blog site of mine.Hmm.There's nothing special 'bout this shit really.I guess I just need a more private blog.As in konti or ako lang ang makaka-access.I need to blurt out all the freakin' shit that builds up inside my massive self.I told myself to try to be always honest,and I think this blog would really help with me telling, or writing for that matter, what I really feel.


I'm nearly finished with my first bottle of beer and I'm feeling the trickly feeling inside of me.Taena,ambilis ko tamaan.Siguro kasi gutom ako.Excuses oh.Hindi ka naman kasi sanay uminom talaga Chris.Paubos na pala yung mga "chi-cha" na kinupit ko.Ayoko nang bumalik sa tindahan at baga magising ang kontrabida sa buhay ko.

Ikalawang bote..

(I'm pretty much sure that the alcohol is working through me na.)

Bakit ngayong nagkaka-ayos kami ni girl2 eh tsaka pa babalik si girl1?
Hindi ko sinasabing may gusto na ulit sakin si girl1(I have no ways of telling..Assuming???) pero bakit tuwing nagiging masaya ako kay girl2,bumabalik siya.An even bigger question really is why am I still sooooo affected?Shit naman oh Chris.Meron pa ba?O wala na?Baka naman meron pa?Ginagamit mo lang ba si girl2?Tanga,hindi.Hindi ko siya ginagamit.Eh bakit ka ganyan?Bakit ako ang itnatanong mo?Bakit hindi mo diretsahin si girl1?Ang gulo mo kasi eh.Hindi ako ang magulo.Pareho kaming magulo.Tangina naman oh.

Tama yan.Biglang kumanta si Ronnie Liang ng "Ngiti".Hayup.

Aftertaste..

Dalawang bote ng San Mig Light (na nakalagay sa feyvrit kong baso) at 4 na "bawang na bawang" na kornicks (rip-off ata to ng Boy Bawang) na ang naubos ko.Hayup.Wala pang 15 minutes yun ah.Ngayon ko lang nalasahan ulit ang ganito.Mapait ang beer.In english, bitter.Parang ako.

Alam kong kasalanan ko kung bakit hindi ako makakasama sa isang grupong ito,ngunit hindi madaling matanggal sa loob loob ko na mauunahan pa ko nang isang "baby" na makatungtong sa isang mas malaking entablado upang magpasikat sa mga taong miyembro din nang iba pang grupo.Oo na.Ako na ang pabida.Bakit?Kaya nga may mga paligsahan diba.Para magpakitang-gilas.Ang stupid naman pag hindi yun kasama sa reason mo nang pagsali.Sorry, I just don't believe it when people say na they join something just "for the experience".Obviously bitter-borg pa ko.HIndi siguro to madaling maalis.Anyways,I'm really trying hard to show people that I'm okay with what's hapenning,even if I really am not okay with this shit.Haha.Slamat sa pag e-enroll sa mga theater workshops eh nakakaraos din naman ako.Call me plastic pero I think this is much better than blatantly announcing to the entire world na bitter ako sa kanya sabay magmukmok sa tabi with matching paawa effect.I soo don't need drama.

Dighay..

First time kong uminom nang mag-isa.
First time kong uminom nang walang dahilan.
First time kong magpost ng entry dito.

Naway marami pa akong first time na mai-share sa inyo...Kung meron mang bumabasa nito...

Secret lang natin to ha..?